Elmer: Hi Rush. I usually read the National Enquirer, but, like, I had to go to the doctor. While I was in the waiting room I flipped through the Health Section of the Washington Post. According to this writer, the British spend forty per cent of what the average American spends on healthcare, yet are healthier and live longer, despite socialized medicine and the rain. She claims ? get this ? that it?s all down to the rich-poor gap! She reckons there?s a correlation between death rates and ?extremes? of wealth (as she calls them). She says that in the US the top ten per cent earn sixteen times more than the poorest ten per cent, and that in countries where income differences are narrower, the death rates are lower.
Rush: Here we go again! Utilizing class envy. Doesn?t it make you sick hearing these goddam pinko liberals go on about successful small business owners and CEO?s and what they get paid. They earn it for chrissakes! If it weren?t for the successful business- men, the liberals wouldn?t have jobs, neither would you. What do you do, Elmer?
Elmer: Between jobs at the moment.
Rush: It?s a good time for it. Did you see how many jobs the President created only last month? If the Democrat party were in power?.
Elmer: Sure. But I?m in my late fifties, with diabetes and heart problems. The health insurance disappeared with the job. As my boss said: ?Elmer, he said, ?this health insurance scheme is going to bankrupt the company.?
Rush: We have the best health services in the world. That stuff about England was cooked up by some tenured university professor, goddamit! It?s a socialist system. Think what our taxes would be if we had that system!! They might live a year or two longer and be healthier, although I doubt it. But think what it does to their companies. The taxes!
Elmer: Sure. The taxes are killing us already. As my boss said to me as he was wishing me well: I work my butt off for this country and what do the Feds do but make me pay over eight million bucks in back tax. At that was after they took me for five million for death tax when my dad died. That?s why he let me go. The tax. It was tough on him.
Rush: See what I mean? These federal government people are rapacious. You know what they are? Homosexuals, blacks and bums on handouts from the government.
Elmer: I hit a bad patch. Guess God overlooked me.
Rush: Oh, He?ll come round. You?ll see. You gotta have faith. Pray, Elmer, pray daily, that?s what you have to do. Believe me, you?ll be rich, you?ll see. Think of it this way, Elmer. Under George Bush ? America?s greatest President, George Bush ? the economy has never been better. You?ll get a job soon, you?ll see. You married?
Elmer: Yes, my wife is in the hospital, having a quadruple bypass as we speak.
Rush: I?m sure sorry to hear that, but if you have to be ill you can?t do better than be treated by the best doctors in the world. Own your own house?
Rush: There you are then. The American dream. You got a house, you got security. No one can take it away from you.
Elmer: My Dad had it before me. He earned good money at the steel mill and owned the house outright by the time he retired. I had to mortgage it a year or two ago to pay the medical bills. There are two of us ill. With any luck we can hang in there till we can both join Medicare. If not, it?s bankruptcy for me.
Rush: Elmer, you?re sounding like a liberal. Be positive! It?s a great country!
Elmer: Hospital and drug costs! They tell me under the new bankruptcy laws they can grab everything they can until you?ve repaid every penny. They can take away the house, it?s the new law. The good news is that I?ll be able to draw social security in a few years.
Rush: Well thank the good Lord that Bush is president. You can also benefit from the new Republican drug program.
Elmer: Will social security be there to help us, that?s the problem.
Rush: Elmer, listen to me, the money in the Social Security Trust Fund was paid in by hard-working, patriotic men like you. It?s being used up by flag-burners, illegal immigrants and homosexuals wanting to marry each other. Do you get that, Elmer? Homo-sexuals marrying each other!! Republicans want the money to go to real Americans.
Elmer: Guess I don?t want my money going to the wrong sort of people.
Rush: You and me, Elmer, we have to stick together, support the President of these United States in the War Against Terror. We have to support our troops in Iraq, courageously fighting those who are trying to kill our wives and loved ones. You a patriotic American, Elmer?
Elmer: Sure I am, Rush! I just want my wife to get better. Myself as well.
Rush: Republicans are the only ones who love America and American families and who are there for you. We have to stand firm against the spongers and liberals. Do you want to be permanently unemployed? Vote democrat. You want Arab terrorists roaming round Ohio, bombing and raping? Vote Democrat. You want taxes to go through the sky? Vote Democrat. But you want to be rich and successful and earn an eight figure sum, vote Republican. God has chosen us, Elmer, God has chosen us.
Elmer: Sure the Republicans have the money. No doubt about it.
Rush: This isn?t the time to complain about our health or our jobs or old age. Be positive and trust our Great President
Elmer: Guess you?re right, Rush. That?s what the pastor said last Sunday in church. I guess something will turn up.